The British Know How to Live
Wednesday, April 06, 2005

A bunch of you have probably been wondering why I haven't had Talia be "Cool Person" of the post yet, so here's my reason. Talia is not a cool person. She is an amazing beyond amazing beyond awesome person. And she knows I love her best of all. Talia and I have been through thick and thin. I don't remember any time in my childhood when I did not know Talia. We first met when I was 2 weeks old and Talia was about a year and a half old. She reached down and rubbed my cheek, and I in turn slapped her nose. Talia burst into tears, while I sat there wondering why she was making so much noise. After that day, Talia and I barely spent time apart. I mean, we both had our commitments, and then we went to separate schools, but we always found time to be together. Mind you, things were far from perfect. Talia and I, as some of you may have noticed, are very different people, but somehow, we still love each other like crazy. In a straight way. When we were in kindergarten/the beginning of grade school, Talia started this habit of trying to be like me. It was very flattering, but oddly annoying. It would go something like this: Mike: Dasha, do you want caviar? Me: No thanks, I don't like caviar. Mike: How about you Talia? Talia: I hate caviar. Mike: No you don't. Talia: YES I DO DADDY. YOU DON'T KNOW ANYTHING. ...or...Me: Talia, why are you getting cheese? I thought you said you didn't like cheese like me, Talia: I don't. Except this kind. And that kind. And this other kind.
Those were good times. Now, things are a little different. Talia's at Kehillah Jewish High, where she's the new hot thing, and I'm Casti. She's into hip hop, and I'm into drama. Well I like hip hop too. But you get the picture. She has her own friends who are way different from mine. But even though we practically come from different worlds (except for the whole Russian Jewish thing), we're truly best friends. Whenever I get to hang out with Talia, I get really excited like a totally idiot, but I can't help it. She's absolutely hilarious and fun to be around. She's totally outrageous, it's true, but at the same time she's very maternal and comforting. I think she's given me some of my most valued advice, such as "Never date a guy unless he treats you like a Goddess," and "Only have sex during a war. It's so much more romantic." Talia and I disagree on many counts, it's true, and I don't know if we would become friends if we just met today, but for some reason, ever since that day many years ago, we've been best friends and I hope that will never ever change. Someday, Talia will go to Columbia and become an OBGYN (after which she will obviously deliver my children), and I will go to Oxford and become a...I don't know yet. But till the day we die, Talia and I will be best friends and sisters, and I will love her with my whole heart. And my heart is fat. Very fat. Like Talia. HAH jkjk darling. God, I probably nearly gave you a heart attack there lol. Oh, and good luck with ze Ry man. He eez good boy. Make babies. Get married. Mwah.
-Talia's byebye

posted at 5:38 PM
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Tuesday, April 05, 2005

Oh god oh god oh god, I have so much damn homework, but I have to finish it before eight today so I can clean up cuz I HAVE to watch Idol. And Scott BETTER get voted off. He's a friggin' girlfriend abuser! And he's scary! Hmph. And now I'm procrastinating, which will give me less time to do homework. Just think...every second I spend on this, I am making myself do homework a whole second faster! Wow. Wow, wow, wow. That's kinda scary. Libby and I did our birth control skits today! Yay! Haha, they're so funny. Libby plays the lady, and I have to play three different contraceptive devices. Yeah, of course I have to be the retarded spong cap spermicide things whatever. And now I'm taking away even more seconds from my homework. I'm really stressing myself out. Damn. And my volleyball team sucks. We lost to...get ready for it...SIXTH GRADERS. Ugh, I wish I was on VB1 with all my friends! I mean, no offence, but I'm better than some of the VB1 people! Ugh, and now I sound like a cold-hearted conceited bitch. But it's true! Okay, gotta go, too many seconds are being taken away from my homework.

posted at 6:26 PM
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Monday, April 04, 2005

Ok, well this weekend was fun. The best part was definitely the end of Saturday. Talia took me to the Kehillah dance, and it was sooo much better than the Casti dances. I danced with two people, and Talia has a new boyfriend, who is very nice, and after giving him my "If you hurt her I'll neuter you slowly and painfully with a wooden knife speech," to which Talia asked "Why wooden?" and Ryan replied, "Splinters," I approved of him, so have many babies and give me one. School is really stressful this week, what with all the tests and projects and volleyball, but I'll get through everything okay. My history project is retarded for a couple reasons which I will not disclose (haha Morgan, Libs). Today, we had nine eighth grade speeches, and it was like a day of emotions. First, Nikki brought me to tears with her speech, and herself, frankly. I love you Nikki, and I'm always there for you. Then, Anan and Annie made me laugh like I haven't laughed in years. They started their speech with "She's blond, she's strong, she's..." Naturally, all of us thought it was a speech about Buffy, so we groaned, but their sentence ended with, "...Amy Klivans!" It turned out to be the most hilarious speech that was ever presented, and I nearly blew my throat and stomach out laughing after the video of Amy going, "If no one liked me, I wouldn't commit suicide," and "I'm not a man! God!" and "I am a woman. I am a real woman." Then Brooke got us all emotional when she told us she was staying at Casti, and ended her speech in tears. God, I don't think I've ever loved anyone as I have my casti girls. You all are amazing--each and every one of you. Moving on from guzzly stuff...Anna and I are singing "What is this feeling?" for the talent show, which should be cool. I like to sing, even though mirrors tend to break in my presence, unline in Anna's, where they are in mirror heaven. Oh, haha, my mom is reading the traveling pants books and she's like totally obsessed. It's so funny. And I just read the third book, which was pretty good. Ok, what's new...I like someone else now...some of you know who, for others, it's up to you to guess. But I gotta go now, so ciao.

posted at 7:11 PM
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