Mer: HELLOE ALL MY FAVOREITISTSEST FANS!!!!!! TODAY IS ADDE-ANE-E DAY(E)!!
Dasha: is not. We're just speaking Olde Englishe stupide.
Mer: hahahahhahahahahahahahahahahahhahahahahah. we watched tHe LiTtLe BlAcK boooook! it was full of blackness and booooks. and little.... people.. and midgets... and people who look ugly when they cry
Dasha: see i dont get why people kept on talking to her and hiring though cuz she was kind of insane. like meredith. like ya. like like. like. LIKE. LIKE LIKE LIKE. HOHOHO. I'M SANTA! BUT NOT. CUZ I'M A JEW BABY. MAZEL TOV BABY. SHALOMIE HOMIE. i hoho you with my jewish santa-ness. be AFRAID. E. AFRAIDE.
Mer: weLL i'm not a jew mozeltovbaby so PSUH! psuhg! YALL!!! YELL! LIKE BANANAS! WHICH MS BARKER SHOWED US WHEN DEMONSTARTING HOW TO PUT A CONDOM ON A ..... nvm.
Dasha: Meredith, you really muste get comfortable saying the word. Now do it with me. HAPPINESS. now, take away the "ha..."
Mer: ppiness. O WAIT I JUST GOT THAT! anyway, when i first here, what did dasha's mom do? SHE FED ME!
Dasha: CUZ SHES RUSSIAN AND JEWISH! LIKE ME! EXCEPT OLDER! AND SHE LIKES TO FEED PEOPLE! AND EAT PEOPLE!
Mer: my mom told me not to eat strangers
Dasha: O YEAH HAHAH no it was cook strangers. STUPIDE
Mer: well at least my FOOTS not SPRAINED
Dasha: SHITE. haha funny. like shit, but not. it rhymes with KITE. SHITY KITE.